The Raving Theist

Dedicated to Jesus Christ, Now and Forever

Creepy

August 10, 2005 | 16 Comments

I know La Shawn Barber’s just trying to be kind, but sorry, I find everything about this post to be downright creepy:

When It Rains, It Pours

The wife of the late Christopher “Superman” Reeve has lung cancer. I don’t know if Mrs. Reeve is a believing woman, but in case she isn’t, I’m going to pray for her salvation.

Lung cancer is “pouring”, indeed: it’s the world’s top cancer killer with 1.3 million deaths worldwide. I’m sure that’s the statistic to which Ms. Barber was referring. Unless of course she just meant Peter Jennings. If she did intend the late anchorman and the universe of raindrops is restricted to celebrities, I have several objections to the analogy. Aside from its elitism (and the fact that two drops do not a downpour make), keep in mind that (1) Mrs. Reeve is merely the spouse of a former celebrity and (2) Ms. Reeve is not dead yet.

The second point makes the prayers for salvation seem a bit premature (although the non-existence of God and an afterlife would make it useless in any event). No reason to rush the poor woman in to the grave. Why not pray for her to be cured, along with the other 1,299,999 non-celebrities? I know that this Washington Post article indicates that such entreaties to the sky are futile, but since Ms. Barber is not really intending to really help anyone in any meaningful way, it’s the thought that counts. Let’s go even further: why not pray that everyone who will die of any cause be saved, regardless of their fame or suspicions of their atheism.

That is what a moral person would do, even one crazy enough to believe in prayer. But Ms. Barber’s view of morality is also crazy:

The Bible declares that we’re all sinners, falling short of God’s glory. We’re not made righteous (sinless) through “morality” or by being a “good person” or following the law. We are righteous through Christ, as testified by the prophets of old and believers in the present age. (Romans 3)

Yes, morality has nothing to do with “morality” or being “good,” those terms being so contemptible they need to be ostracized with scare quotes. True morality involves being righteous “through” a crucified Jew, the quotes here indicating I don’t have the slightest idea what the word means in this context. Do I crawl “through” the holes in his hands or feet? Also, why do I do that? Such a wacky theory really calls for an explanation, certainly more than a bare citation to a book of mythology.

Assuming the salvation theory is coherent and/or correct, it might be more effective to e-mail Mrs. Reeve the details. The odds that she’ll chance across Ms. Barber’s blog are rather slim. It almost looks like Ms. Barber is merely using Mrs. Reeve’s quasi-celebrity to broadcast to her readers that she is a “good person,” which would not make her “good” at all. No, she really needs to contact Mrs. Reeve and carefully explain the roadmap to heaven. Especially since the stakes are so high:

God also says that the penalty for sin is death, spiritually (separation from God) and physically, but those who believe in Christ are “pardoned” and will have eternal life. We Christians need to remember that there will always be those who don’t know Christ and don’t want to know Him, even mocking us to our faces for believing such things.

Here Ms. Barber correctly (if dimly) perceives that those uninitiated in her superstitions might find her barking moonbat crazy. Once again, if her martyr-god theory has some underlying merit, this would be the place to lay it out. Barking louder doesn’t really help:

But God told us it would be so:

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. For it is written: “I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate.”

Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. For the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength.

Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things

Comments

16 Responses to “Creepy”

  1. vjack
    August 10th, 2005 @ 8:08 am

    If he prays for her salvation and she ends up dying anyway, I guess her death was all part of god’s plan. This sort of reasoning makes me sick. How about these Christians learn to provide comfort and compassion without resorting to fairy tales?

  2. just_another_primate
    August 10th, 2005 @ 9:13 am

    My goodness – what a bunch of gobledygook that is — it literally makes no sense … and that is from the “inspired word of god” ?

    Boggles the rational mind I tell you !!!

  3. Eva
    August 10th, 2005 @ 9:58 am

    But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things

  4. Vernichten
    August 10th, 2005 @ 10:29 am

    I don’t mind too much when Christians want to sit in the corner and mumble their suggestions on how the king of the universe could be running things better and call it prayer.
    The problem occurs when they get in the way of real progress and insist that others must subscribe to their “problem-solving” methods in place of useful scientific research. It’s a serious thing and it takes them out of the realm of the silly and into the realm of being a serious threat.

  5. hermesten
    August 10th, 2005 @ 10:49 am

    Eva, God created ALL cancer. There can only be one reason a being with God’s intellect and power created things like cancer: He’s an evil shit who likes to watch living creatures suffer. You can bet, if Jesus really was the son of God, and they’d had firecrackers back then, He’d have used them to blow-up frogs, just like George Dubya Bush.

  6. AK
    August 10th, 2005 @ 11:43 am

    I love how you pointed out the term flipping, RA. Weak is strong, foolish is wise. Christianity loves to do these kinds of things.

    I am reminded of the climax scene of the movie “The Devil’s Advocate” where Al Pachino is criticizing God and says “he put the rules in opposition!”

    ;)

  7. AntiFaithSTL
    August 10th, 2005 @ 1:25 pm

    ere’s a poser for all the Xians… Why not have earthly wisdom and god’s wisdom THE SAME THING? Wouldn’t that make his plan for everything a bit more palatable to everyone? God’s plan would follow logic. That way EVERYONE could follow it. It’s almost like he DARES people to believe in him. Harkens back to the late Bill Hick’s “Prankster God” bit. “Does that bother anyone? The idea that GOOOOOOOD… might be FUCKING WITH OUR HEADS!?”
    Seems to me to be some sub-conscious, subversive admit ion by the biblical authors that it’s all a bunch of bullshit, so deeply woven into the fiber of the bible that most wingnuts’ head would explode if they actually tried to figure it out.

  8. hermesten
    August 10th, 2005 @ 2:46 pm

    Christianity is dangerous to your health –if you don’t believe in God. Just read this: “More than 50 percent of Americans have a “negative” or “highly negative” view of people who do not believe in God; 70 percent think it important for presidential candidates to be “strongly religious.” ”

    http://www.alternet.org/module/printversion/23964

    If you think Christians are going to play fair, or use whatever power they acquire, morally, or justly, you are sadly deluded, perhaps even suicidal. Depending on what percentage of the population you want to ascribe to atheism and agnosticism, this means that the majority of people in this country have a negative view of us here, and want to impose their beliefs upon us. Any atheists from New Zealand or Australia posting here that can tell us what it takes to immigrate?

  9. John C. Randolph
    August 10th, 2005 @ 3:15 pm

    So, George Orwell was plagiarizing God? Who knew?

    -jcr

  10. AssBouncer
    August 10th, 2005 @ 5:01 pm

    I would love to know if the gullibility required to believe in the Christian faith as depicted in the bible carries over into other areas of life? Do they prey to be relieved of cancer? Do they hell! Are they then perhaps more susceptible to general scams (extended warranty, time shares, etc). Is there data on mugs broken doen by faith? This halloween I plan to do an experiment. I will put a sheet on my head and go up to known christians and say “whoooooo, I—am—-a—ghost—–whooooo”. I will then try the same with atheists and record how many of my victims can be convinced that I am in fact a ghost.

  11. Fred Evil
    August 10th, 2005 @ 9:28 pm

    I made the dreadful mistake of visiting this woman’s page, and my brain still hurts….

    One small example, a quote from “The American Thinker” (which I take umbrage with…..don’t try and lump you and I together blitherers)…raves about “Her independence of thought…” hmmm the main page has her stating in the space of two small paragraphs…

    “The Bible declares…” “God also says…” and that “…God told us it would be so:” and then she’s cut and pasted three paragraphs from the Bible…

    Ummm….independence of thought…? Hmmm…..first you paraphrase the Bible, and then you paste in what you just paraphrased as proof of your statements validity…and I’M the jackass for questioning it?!

    If only I were Jewish, my “Oy Gevalt!” could carry some weight…

    Friggin’ ouch! my brain!

  12. Vaginiform Grimace
    August 10th, 2005 @ 11:26 pm

    Christianity is not only bullshit but includes core elements that would make no moral or philosophical sense even if myths such as the Resurrection and Creation were true. I enjoy it (so to speak) when, in response to others’ pointing this out, Christians batter their Bibles with even greater fervor — and, yes, triumph — because it says right in the fucking text that nonbelievers would one day look askance at the whole freakshow. You don’t say! The politically motivated writers, editors and assemblers of the Bible — knowing full well that outsiders would one day demand external evidence of the Bible’s absurd and obtuse claims — prophesied that there would be doubters? What are the odds?

    It’s hard to laugh at people who are this jarringly bereft of congitive candlepower. On the other hand, unlike my younger days I no longer give a shit these religious twitterers “think” they’re trying to be good. A wasp isn’t acting out of what humans term malice when it stings my ass, but I’ll still smash the fucker into the next dimension if I can.

  13. MBains
    August 12th, 2005 @ 10:43 am

    …Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth.

    Hhhmmm… So what it is saying is that only stupid, worthless and ignoble folk need apply for Christie’s salvatory ministrations.

    Hhhmmm… I’m thinkin’ that’s not much of a sales pitch. No wonder the Catholic’s just slaughtered everyone who wouldn’t accept those terms. Imagine how many christians there would be today if’n death by auto de fey or a simple sword slash hadn’t been our Euro ancestors’ only alternative. Reason predicts very few indeed.

    Hhhmmm…

  14. John B
    August 12th, 2005 @ 5:00 pm

    AssBouncer said: This halloween I plan to do an experiment. I will put a sheet on my head and go up to known christians and say “whoooooo, I—am—-a—ghost—–whooooo”. I will then try the same with atheists and record how many of my victims can be convinced that I am in fact a ghost.

    With eyes or without? The eyes are a dead giveaway….

  15. hermesten
    August 12th, 2005 @ 5:19 pm

    “I would love to know if the gullibility required to believe in the Christian faith as depicted in the bible carries over into other areas of life?”

    I don’t think you can generalize, but in some specific instances I think the answer is obviously “yes.” I remember reading several years ago about a doctor, in Utah I think, who was “molesting” female patients. He got away with it for years by targeting devout Mormon women for abuse, because he knew that their subordination to male “authority,” and their ignorance of, and embarassment about, sex, would make them readily exploitable.

    I think you also need to distinguish between people who believe something because they are gullible, and people who believe the same things for other, or more sophisticated reasons, and merely appear to be guillible. Some very smart people believe this nonsense, and have developed very sophisticated rationalizations and techniques of intellectual compartmentalization in order to limit the damage done by this irrationality in the other parts of their lives.

  16. Bill from INDC
    August 12th, 2005 @ 9:48 pm

    Raving Atheist, couple things:

    1. A natural implication from “when it rains it pours” could also be the amount of hardship in Reeve’s life. But nevertheless, I’m not sure you’re quite being fair by taking down her casual title, if it referenced two celebrities getting cancer. But I’m nitpicking.

    2. LaShawn’s decision to pray for Reeve’s salvation is her attempt (once again) to affirm herself by applying a hyper-religious angle to every situation. I mean, she is one of the saved. She’s shaking her head from the VIP room.

    3. Yeah, it’s pretty damn creepy that she can’t simply hope or pray for Reeve’s recovery, instead of validating her sense of self-worth in the process.

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